Sassy Quack

Monday, July 31, 2006


Today I brought home a new car. I think I'm going to get an ulcer. After two years of car payment free living, it was finally time. My credit needed the boost too. Still, the commitment is freaking me out. Goodbye discretionary funds...hello adulthood I guess.

I'll feel better when I sell my old car and it isn't sitting there waiting...reminding me that there is just a SMALL chance I didn't make the right choice.

Too late to go back,
Sassy Quack

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Ankle Biters

Apparently there needs to be an addition to the rules here...and in general.

I went to see Pirates of the Caribbean over the weekend...and there were CHILDREN in the 11:30PM show! Fortunately, they were all passed out very soon after the movie began-but it could've been much it was at a recent dinner out.

Why is it that parents seem to think it is ok to inflict their snot ridden spawn upon us when it is clearly NOT appropriate. We all have had our nice evenings ruined by ill-mannered and exhausted children dragged by BAD PARENTS to places they ought not be...nice restaurants, late shows, nice stores, etc. The parents then act indignant when we complain and fail to recognize the genious and preciousness of the creature shrieking and flinging vegetables around the room.

That's right-you are BAD PARENTS,
Sassy Quack

Monday, July 10, 2006

Crimes of Fashion

Why won't leggings die? Is there something intrinsic in women that kicks in at a certain point in life saying "It is must replace all previously fashionable attire with leggings and oversized blouses-preferably depicting fruit."

Overweight women seem to think that shoehorning themselves into something akin to a sausage casing is a fabulous way to look more svelte...seemingly oblivious to the hideousness of the result. I found leggings marketed for just this use. Now-while this might be a good thing to wear UNDER your pants, they do not adequately take the place of matter how kicky you feel the design may be.

The same goes for other women. Leggings are. Not. pants.

Sassy Quack

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Smart Cars.

I've been in love with them since I first saw one in Italy back in 2000. They are FINALLY coming to the US in 2008. Unfortunately, that is a bit late for me. My Ford POS is on its way out NOW. I MUST have a Smart Car in 2006. But how?

Dilemma of the moment= how to turn $0 and 0 availability into 1 cool ride.

I never was that good at math,
Sassy Quack

Tuesday, July 04, 2006


I spent the day of the 3rd in my office...sulking because my presence was required. None of the companies I work with on a daily basis were open and everything else was caught there was very little to do. To be honest, I really didn’t have anything else going on that I was being kept from...but it was the idea that my company was oblivious to the presence of a holiday that irked me...and then I was annoyed with myself for being upset for such a little reason.

Later that evening, I went to The Boyfriend’s restaurant for dinner. When we walked in, the place had fallen apart. I guess people hadn’t shown up/called off. The Boyfriend took one look and went scampering off to the after a few minutes of watching the hostess look like a deer in headlights, I put down my purse and helped her. THIS work I did not mind...and upon further thought, decided the reason was that I felt I had not felt at my office that day.

I am quite capable of amusing myself for the duration of the workday on occasions where there is not much to be done...but it is not particularly satisfying. Perhaps this is a sign that I need to be in a faster paced field? Or does this feeling wear off?


Sassy Quack

Friday, June 30, 2006


Growing up, I was taught, as so many are, to respect my elders. This included being polite and acquiescing to their demands.

I remember the first time I ever broke this golden rule. I was sixteen and working at a coney island. I'd battled my parents successfully in order to be allowed to work and was determined to make a success of it. Jimmy, the aging cashier, was of Middle Eastern descent but spoke better English than most of the others on staff; which he used to torment everyone else. He seemed to think all of the waitresses existed solely to obey his commands. The breaking point came when he dropped a dish of rice pudding and attempted to command me to clean it up. I lost it and much angry shrieking ensued.

He cleaned up his own mess.

In that case, Jimmy had no actual authority over any of us. Still, I felt some degree of guilt for yelling at an old man...however much he deserved it...though this was mostly overwhelmed by a glowing satisfaction with standing up for myself in the face of injustice.

Now, my world is populated with Jimmy's. Some actually have the authority to boss me around and some don't. For those who do, I wonder why it is that when we become successful, we think it is ok to demand that others (who are NOT our assistants) do things for us that we could easily do ourselves...interrupting their actual work. Are we so insecure that we must ensure that those "below" us know their place? For those who don't, I suppose they are just trying to make up for the fact that they never made anything of themselves.

I wonder why I listen to them. The sixteen year old deep inside screams out in frustration.

Perhaps getting older means that you develop the social skill of politely tolerating those who have none.

I have not yet worked for my own Devil in Prada. I know when she comes along though, I will be ready to face her-and resent her in silence.

Sassy Quack

Monday, May 22, 2006

DaVinci Disappointment

For shame, Ron Howard. We expect better of you.

In the adaptation of a book for the screen, it is understandable that cuts must be made in the interest of time. It is important though, to ensure that these cuts don't punch holes in the fabric of the story. Not only does Ron Howard fail to ensure this, he changes the nature of the interpersonal relationships in the story making the characters nearly impossible to care about.

Bezu Fache is now a member of Opus Dei. Dan Brown's Fache was a strong, driven, COP. The job was his religion and while we rooted against him, we knew that he was one of the good guys...France's own Detective Andy Sipowicz. Ron Howard has turned him into a religious zealot who blindly follows the direction of his church. He isn't a bulldog, he's a chihuahua. His eventual redemption fails to instill the same respect we have for Brown's Fache.

Where is the love story between Langdon and Sophie? Audrey Tautou, perhaps put off by Tom Hanks' unfortunate hairstyle and odd facial bloat, fails to give off ANY heat. One could argue that the love story isn't essential to the plot...but it certainly does make it more compelling. Many have also said that Tom Hanks is miscast here. I disagree. His Langdon comes across as intelligent and as accessible as possible given the writing. The failure is in his connection with Sophie. The actress cast in the part should have been one who was able to generate a powerful chemistry with him. We all know he could hold up his end of the deal. Is this not why there is a such thing as a screen test? (I now point my wand of shame at Janet Hirshenson, John Hubbard, and Jane Jenkins)

It seems that the filmmakers deliberately sought to crush all emotional connections that existed in the book. The result is that the characters are hard to access, and therefore, hard to care about. We are not caught up with the urgency we had to turn just one more page to find out what happened next. Jacques Sauniere is no longer Sophie's REAL grandfather. Why not? Why do we see him engaged in the ceremony that drives Sophie away and never learn that the woman with him is her grandmother? Why do we never learn of her grandparents powerful love for each other and their family that drives their life choices? With no mention of any of this, the appearance of Sophie's grandmother at the end of the film is awkward and empty. Where is her brother? The conclusion of Sophie's journey is not nearly as satisfying in the film. She just abruptly disappears as Langdon heads back to Paris.

Howard's characters are hollow shells of the complex human stories of Brown's design. How hard was this Ron? Almost all of the work was done for you and you just threw it away.


Stepping of my soapbox and walking away in disappointment,
Sassy Quack


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